When Her World Fall Apart
by Karoline Tesla
Summary: Jane has always been the strongest woman of the BPD. She has always fought for those she loves. But when it comes the doubt, when death takes those she loves, Jane finds herself alone with for only protection, her gun hanging on at her belt. How will she react?Will face the world alone and she finally found peace in the eyes of his new love?


**Hey everyone,**

 **This is my first story in english so please let me some reviews to help me to improve my writing.**

 **I hope you will love it? Have a nice moment with the short story about Jane's struggle.**

 **Take care,**

 **K. Tesla xoxo**

* * *

 **RIZZOLI & ISLES: WHEN HER WORLD FALL APART**

Days were longs and Nights were endless. Alone in her bed, Jane couldn't stop thinking about everything she lost. She was almost forty and nothing seemed to be enduring. She has believed in strong and eternal love when Casey came back in her life but as in the past, her handsome soldier gave up and continued his road without her somewhere in the Balkans.

Since the loss of her child seen as a second chance, since her best friend's death, she has lost the happiness manual. Even Maura, her best friend, her confidant no longer had the words to give her smile again. In front of the world the badass detective pretended to be happy and strong but when the door was closed, her life was completely different. Jane was stuck in a morbid routine that prevented her from sinking but that didn't help her to go on.

When insomnia kept her awake, she thought at her past memories with Frost or Casey. She was afraid of forget the real meaning of the word "Happiness". Then she through the rest of the night to curse her to have failed and let her baby died in her belly. At five o'clock when she had no more hope to have a little moment of rest, she get up and went running and free her mind before wore her iron lady's mask.

Sadly, masks are friable, uncertain and ephemeral. Jane discovered this on that sweet day of April. The BPD team is investigated on a missing case of a four year old little girl. She was missing since four months when the BPD took the case. The little girl named Sarah has been seen with her kidnapper in the capital town of Massachusetts few days before. Everyone worked very hard on this case. Night and day, Jane has looking for this little princess.

April was just coming with its beautiful days of spring. For the first time for longtime, Jane was confident. They had found where the little girl was. They will arrest the culprit and bring back Sarah to her family. Nothing seemed to prevent their success but it was without thinking of the unpredictable side of the human being.

Four pm, was the time of the intervention, at this hour the man came at the kindergarten to bring back "his daughter" at home. While the BPD team was waiting in front of the kindergarten, Jane received a call from her past. Casey called to get some news about her and their baby-to-be. He had also great news to announce. Jane felt her guts squeezed, tears rolled down her cheeks. It wasn't the moment to let her heart fall apart. She apologized and explained that she was busy. She promised to call him back after that the rescue mission was over. Her teammates have felt her pain but they haven't found the courage to ask her if "she was alright" only because they were afraid by her anger. They had been witness of Jane anger against Maura Isles few days ago.

"Let's go!"

It were the only words said by the detective when she saw the man arrive. Sadly, the suspect saw them and started to run with the little girl in his arms. The team could shoot him without take the risk to hurt the little Sarah. Jane replaced her gun in her holster and run after him. She felt her heart exploded in that race against time. Everything seems to escape from her in her life but it was impossible for her that the situation escaped from her again.

"Mackenzie! Mackenzie! Stop, there is nowhere you can go!"

Jane took her gun out of her holster when they were stuck in a dead end. The young woman interiorly prayed for that the back-up come rapidly because she felt not well to fight against this man. The suspect was determined, he already had lost his family, Sarah was the only reason for him to stay alive and no one could take her away. Jane moved forward with her gun up in a sign of submission when she saw Mackenzie put a gun against Sarah forehead.

"Go away! Leave my daughter in peace! She is mine, no one will…"

"I know! I only want to know if she is ok! After that, I promise I'll leave you and your daughter alone!", answered Jane who was moving forward again.

"No! Don't move!"

The beautiful detective known that something was going wrong, her guts screamed her to step back but her will to rescue Sarah was stronger. Jane rushed her at him and ordered Sarah to run fast and far away. Sarah didn't wait and run. There were gunshots, blood, and screams and then nothing but silence. The heavy silence was terrible for Jane who got up without a scratch. Mackenzie lied on the floor, his chest cover by his blood. Jane looked down and saw the body of Sarah lied on few step away. Her heart stopped and squeezed. She run toward the little princess and took her in her arms. Jane knelt in the child blood that she couldn't save. She rocked her as we lull an ill child and begged her to stay with her until the rescue arrived.

The ballet of flashing light, questions, and worries made Jane switch to autopilot. She left the crime scene and went find her refuge in her flat. Nobody would bother her in here. She had kick out the other so many times that they finished by leave her alone and give up. Angela and Maura were the strongest but even them finished by give up the battle.

Her flat was silent, too much silent. She had so much hope to hear children laughs in her living room that the silence scared her. She broke down and thrown her family frame through the living room. Her family didn't exist anymore and will not again. She felt her heart exploded at each new pain crises. She went in her bedroom and emptied every drawer of the room. She looked for a little bit of comfort. She finally found it in a small box where she kept every precious secrets of her life. She emptied the box on her bedspread and let her felt on in tears.

Picture of her in Casey's arms when they were in high school were intermingled with her memories of trip with Maura and the gift of Frost that she never wore because she was afraid to lost it. She put against her belly the picture of her little princess that she could never hug as she could never hug again the father of her baby. The fact is that she could call Casey, she could tell him how much she is alone, how much she needed him next to her, how much she is fragile since their little child was no more but once again she hadn't the courage anymore. She turned on her left side to observe her hurtful memories when she felt the cold metal of her gun against her skin.

A little sad smile was born on her lips. Her weapon was the only one which is never give up her. She take it out of her holster and laid it down her pillow next to her face and if her gun was the real and only answer to her problems.

Maura had her life with Jack now and one day or another, she will join him in Arizona. Angela had her love story with Sean Cavanaugh and found a new hope for a happy life with her grand-children. Even Tommy had found a family with Lydia and TJ. Frankie had finally touch his goals and had no need of his big sister to protect him against the world and malicious women. Korsak had Josh and Casey his General rank, his child dream became reality.

No one needed her anymore on Earth. She started to think about the last words of her nonna just before she died. "One day you will know that is time for you to go, time to find your place in Heaven. This day, I'll be there to welcome you but since this day live, be happy, ma Chiara." Jane closed her eyes and thought: "And if this day is finally arrived? And if finally she will meet again everyone who were gone to early? She took her gun in her hand and couldn't help a smile when an old explanation of Maura came in her mind.

"Statistics show us that women never committed suicide with a gun. It's a male act, women prefer medication."

"I'm sorry, Maura but you're wrong this time." thought Jane while her fingers stroked the canon of her gun.

Her heart squeezed when she thought to Maura. This woman made her believed in strong friendship and perfect love between women. They were more than best friend but with all this dead, Jane had failed to comfort the one who had become, over the years, her pillar, her lighthouse in the storm of existence.

At this thought, her shell blown up and tears rolled down the cheeks of the beautiful Italian. Nobody was here to hear her cry. So they let them fall on her pillow. She let her roll on her back, the cold canon of her gun against her temple. With sobs in her voice, Jane cried out for help but her call lost it in the silence of her flat.

Her gesture was simple. She made it hundred times, and hundred time she touched her target. A sob, a finger on the trigger, a gun armed, a trigger pulled, a loud sound and then nothing except the weight of the death on her chest.

Death was more and more heavy on her but her life pain was still here, in her without the will of leave her. She felt the rain fall… The rain? What the rain was doing in her flat! Jane opened her eyes and met Casey's. She tried to move her armed hand but Casey stopped her with her strong fist around her wrist. His eyes were begging her.

"Casey…" sobbing Jane with pain.

 ** _A FEW MINUTES EARLY:_**

Casey arrived in front of the door of Jane's flat. He had a flower bouquet in a hand and a bottle of Champagne in the other. He knew that Jane was at home. Her car was down the street and her neighbor never saw her get out of her flat since she was arrived few hours ago. He was confident to meet the woman who he loved even in her difficult situation for few months. He knocked sadly he obtained no answer. Maura had prevent him that he wouldn't be welcome in Jane's life but that wasn't an efficient reason for Casey to give up his fight. He tried again and after obtained no answer he preferred use the key that Maura gave to him. He stepped silently in the flat. He wouldn't awake the detective. He dropped the flowers and the bottle of champagne with a little word on the counter of the kitchen and turn around to go away. He was stopped by a familiar sound. He was trained to recognize this kind of clink. He was trained to react at this kind of situation but in Afghanistan not in a flat in the middle of Boston. This sound was characteristic of a gun armed. He understood rapidly the situation and run in the direction of the clink. He rushed in the bedroom and spread the gun away Jane's temple. The bullet finished its run in the wall.

The minutes after seems to be as long as Eternity. Finally, Jane opened her eyes and let escaped a whisper of surprise before felt in tears. She hung her to him as a shipwrecked to her raft. He had never seen Jane so weak, so broke. He tugged her hug while Jane repeated again and again the same sentence as a mantra: "It's my fault, I'd kill her! I'd kill her."

Casey didn't understand what was about but he knew that it was the thing that destroyed everything. He kissed her again and again in her hairs to comfort her. The BPD team alerted by a gunshot alarm in Jane building arrived in the flat.

The young General ignored what it was happen in Jane's life since he was in the Balkans but he knew that Jane didn't want to be seen by her colleagues and friends as a broken woman. Jane always refused to show her as a weak person and Casey made everything he can to protect her.

He helped her to lay down her sheet and kissed her on her forehead. He took her gun and took it apart before joined Jane's colleague in the living room. Everyone except Maura seemed to be surprise to see him here. The pretty blonde made her appearance with fear in her eyes.

"Sorry to worry you, it's a false alert. It's my fault, I'm sorry. Jane cleaned her gun when I arrived. I offered her to it during her nap. I hadn't seen the bullet in the canon. It's my mistake."

"Is she ok?" ask Maura with a worry voice.

"She just felt asleep. I can go to see her, if you want. And please take her gun, she doesn't need it since Monday." said Casey to Korsak.

"Thanks, General! But I don't think that Jane want us around her. She needs to be alone and get some rest."

After few questions, the flat found its calm again. Casey went back to Jane's bedroom. Jane sat in the middle of her sheets, her eyes was full of tears. He came to sit down next to her and hugged her tenderly. He knew that Jane will rapidly open her heart and revealed her secrets. And he was right. Ten minutes later she told him everything, she talked about the others who were happy even if Frost was dead while she felt in the darkness of depression. The others saw the happiness in the future while she cried again and again this child lost before even saw the light of the life. Casey had tears on her cheeks. Jane, her rebel princess who always had the right word for the other, was let alone face to face with her sadness.

"You will have this child, Jane, I promise you."

"With whom?" sobbing Jane hung to Casey's shirt. "You aren't here anymore. I loved you and you are gone…"

"But I'm back and I will never go away. I will go where you will be. The Army is now my past."

"That is what you would say to me at the phone?"

"Yes that it's."

"I thought that you would speak about your sexy secretary who you will marry and that you will give up me again."

"Chut. There was no wonderful secretary, there was only you and there will be only you. Promise me to always call me when you have a problem. I don't want to see you suffer again."

"You aren't angry?" asked Jane with pain.

"Why? No!"

"This child, our child, I killed her. I…"

"No, I forbid you to think that. You saved Tasha. You made your job. I would had watching on you. I would have understood that you needed me instead of try to become a General. We will realize your dream, you will have your family, and together we will succeed."

"And your dream of becoming the chief of the US army, your…"

"That tasted nothing when you weren't here with me. I will never leave you."

Jane closed her eyes, she didn't know if it is a dream or the reality but now she didn't care about it. She received with relief her lover's lips on hers in a shy kiss but heavy of promises and love. She felt asleep few minutes later.

Tomorrow, in a day or two, in a month or in a decade, she knew that the life will offer her that she wishes: A family. For the moment, Casey was here, he was come back to her for her. She knew that she never will be alone again to face the World!

* * *

 **So? Did you love it? Thanks Casey who save her... :)**

 **Have a nice day,**

 **K. Tesla xoxo**


End file.
